on a monday

I'm putting my house back together one room at a time today. I got an early start on the kitchen. While I was steaming the floor, I listened to the third chapter of Teachings of Presidents of the Church, Gordon B. Hinckley. I had to share this quote:

"There is a terrible ailment of pessimism in the land. It's almost endemic. We're constantly fed a steady and sour diet of character assassination, faultfinding, evil speaking of one another. ...

"I come with a plea that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I'm suggesting that we accentuate the positive. I'm asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment virtue and effort.

"I am not asking that all criticism be silent. Growth comes with correction. Strength comes with repentance. Wise is the man or woman who, committing mistakes pointed out by others, changes his or her course. I am not suggesting that our conversation be all honey. Clever expression that is sincere and honest is a skill to be sought and cultivated. What I am suggesting and asking is that we turn from the negativism that so permeates our society and look for the remarkable good in the land and times in which we live, that we speak of one another's virtues more than we speak of one another's faults, that optimism replace pessimism. Let our faith replace our fears.

"We have every reason to be optimistic in this world. Tragedy is around, yes. Problems everywhere, yes. But ... you can't, you don't, build out of pessimism or cynicism. You look with optimism, work with faith, and things happen.

"Do not despair. Do not give up. Look for the sunlight through the clouds. Opportunities will eventually open to you. Do not let the prophets of gloom endanger your possibilities."

What a great way to start a new week! I hope your Monday is a happy one.

happy weekend

It's the time of year when the citrus is ready to be picked and juiced. Yesterday I juiced a few bags of oranges and my house smelled so fresh for the rest of the day. We got so many lemons this year! I used to freeze the juice to make lemonade all year long, but do you know what's in lemonade? Lots and lots of sugar, so I don't make it as often anymore, and now our main use of the lemons is to squeeze them on top of our Sunday morning german pancakes. Must research how to use more lemons (outside of my favorite lemon deserts: warm lemon pudding cake, lemon cake, lemon squares, and lemon poppy seed muffins).

Thanks to your comments, I tried a few new recipes this week. Rollup Blender Pancakes from Mel's Kitchen Cafe were probably the biggest hit (even though they were for breakfast and not dinner). We also tried Mel's 30-Minute Quinoa Enchilada Skillet (Mabel and I loved it), Our Best Bite's Black Bean Soup and Baked Creamy Chicken Taquitos. I would make them all again. Thank you! Oh, and we brought these Healthy Applesauce Oat Muffins to Sunday dinner and they were gone in a flash.

I printed out lots more recipes from those sites to try next week, too. Hurray!

This is the best time of year to be in Arizona, so we are going to do our best to soak it up this weekend. Yard work is on our to-do list, and hopefully we'll actually do it instead of loafing around like we usually do on Saturdays. Ha!

Have a happy one!

for teens

Friday night's meeting was broadcast from a chapel in Queen Creek, about 35 minutes from me. But Saturday night's meeting, which was for teenagers and their youth leaders, was live right here in Mesa! Since I was recently asked to serve in the Young Women's organization in my ward, I got to attend Saturday night, too.

Just like Friday night's meeting, Saturday night was very casual and candid, but this one was geared toward teenagers. Here are my notes:

Elder Ballard started the meeting by sharing one word that would change the teens' lives: desire. If they desire to know the mysteries of God, or if they desire to follow Jesus Christ, then like Nephi and like Joseph Smith, they can have their own "sacred grove" experience, which will help them remain true to the teachings of the gospel.

On the proper use of media: Elder Rasband urged the youth to be connected to the church's media sites. He cautioned them to police themselves. The adversary has entered into our personal space through our devices. If we dedicate time to the word of God each day, we will be able to better withstand the offerings of the adversary.

On preparing for a mission: Elder Ballard said that if desire is focused in the right place, it will be easy to stay morally clean and serve a mission. He said that they should do all that they can to prepare, but leave some time for fun, too. Learn to be a hard worker, make prayer more meaningful. For girls (who are not expected to serve missions) listen to the Spirit when deciding whether or not to go. Focus instead on living the way Heavenly Father wants you to live. Don't be nervous to share the gospel, just stand tall. Anxiety can become a problem when we are too anchored in the internet. Learn to talk to people face to face. When you have a question, seek the answer from the Lord before seeking it elsewhere.

On being happy: Elder Robbins said that the more we become like Jesus Christ, the happier we will be. Because He was always serving others, he was always happy, and so can we be. Pray for happiness and for the opportunity to use our talents to serve others. Smile more. It is a choice.

On opposition and peer pressure: Elder Costa said "It is better to prevent than to fix." Choose good friends. If you are with friends and they make bad choices, leave. Don't stay to be a good example. Just leave.

On dating and marriage: Elder Ballard reminded that kids that one date with someone does not make you a couple! Keep yourself pure and clean. Don't let the world dictate how we live. Stay close to your parents. Have fun. Don't do anything to mar the beauty of your spirit. And never, never ask someone on a date through a text message. :)

The overall feeling that I got from both of these meetings was that the answers are always simple. Live the gospel. Be happy. Serve others. If our desire is in the right place, we will already be doing the right things. Don't worry too much, everything will will be ok in the end.

for parents

Sometimes the responsibility of parenting these children feels really heavy and I wonder if I am teaching them everything they need to know. Well, on Friday night, Mike and I attended a special meeting just for parents, held here in the Phoenix Metropolitan area. Elder Ballard and Elder Rasband were in attendance, as well as other general authorities from our church. It was a casual, candid setting and I really enjoyed learning from these men. I promised to share my notes here. I hope you find them as helpful as I did.

On overcoming spiritual apathy: Elder Ballard suggested making prayer, scripture study, family home evening, and family councils a priority. Never allow our love for Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ to be secondary to other things. Don't give ourselves or our children time to become apathetic. Be anxiously engaged in the gospel together.

On social media: Elder Rasband said that we need to strategize. We need to be prayerful and come up with a plan to protect our children from the negative effects of social media. We need to create an environment where our children can come to us with questions. As we answer their questions, we should try to use the Savior's words. We need to set boundaries together on internet/social media use as a family council.

Elder Robbins talked about how unfortunately our children sometimes seek their self worth in the internet. They compare themselves to the perfection they see portrayed there and can feel diminished. He says youth are looking for their identity on the internet, so point them toward family history work. This will help them find their true identity. The more time they spend on the internet, the lower their self worth will be. As parents, we need to help them to not be idle, and to retire early and arise early. Revelation comes best in the early morning hours. Also, Heavenly Father often publicly praised His Son. How often do we do that? We need to catch our children doing good and praise them for it. If we observe them, we can give them a true reflection of who they really are. Make a conscious effort to notice the good. We are their best mirror and can help them recognize their worth. Also, use For the Strength of Youth to plan family home evening lessons.

On pornography: Elder Costa made four good points. 1- Assume they have been exposed to it already. 2- Hold frequent father interviews. Guided by the spirit, ask questions to determine if it is a pattern or just a single incident. 3- Turn on our devices only once our intention is clear. Once you have accomplished your purpose, turn them off again. Don't idly scroll. 4- Have hope. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, anything can be overcome, including pornography.

On preparing for missions: Elder Ballard had some great advice. He said preparation should start early. Make sure our children know our expectations. Know your child's friends. Help them get a job and earn some money so that they know how to work. Help them be responsible for their own things. Teach them to pick up after themselves. Help them to read the Book of Mormon on their own and gain a testimony of it. Sit with your children and have them bear their testimony of Jesus Christ to you. If they can't, or aren't sure of His role in their life, help them to learn about Him. Read Preach My Gospel together. Teach them the value of one soul. Help them to understand what Christ did in Gethsemane for each of us.

I don't remember who said this, but we need to respect our child's agency. We teach them the doctrine, but we have to leave them at the crossroads of decision, trusting that the Holy Ghost will guide them and that they will listen.

happy weekend

How in the world is it Friday already?! This is one of those weeks where the days really flew by, which makes the weekend even more exciting, doesn't it? We are all ready for a break.

Tonight Mike and I get to go to a large, regional meeting at church for parents of teenagers. And then tomorrow night I get to bring my class of 14-16 year old girls to another meeting just for the teens. I will take copious notes and share them next week. I am really looking forward to hearing the wisdom from some leaders in our church on the issues parents of teens face these days. I think it's going to be good.

I talked about this on instagram the other day, but I'll share it here, too. Elliot's reading has really improved since we started taking turns reading the scriptures out loud during dinner. I used to read the scriptures to the kids in the morning while they ate their breakfast, and that worked fine. But this school year our schedules have changed and dinner time reading is a better fit for our family. We keep a set of inexpensive scriptures on a cake stand in the middle of our table at all times, so they are easily accessible and easily replaceable, since we pass them around while we are eating and greasy fingers are inevitable. It is a nice break from the evening rush.

I'm in a major dinner rut. We've been eating too many potatoes and eggs at our house lately. What is your go-to dinner recipe? I'd love to try something new.

I hope the sun is shining wherever you are this weekend!

california, last week

A quick California recap, instagram style.

Leslie flew into my town and then drove with me to California to see my other sister, Julianne, who was visiting with her kids (including brand new darling Helena). The three of us span the distance of the United States and it's not very often that we are all together.

There is just something about the ocean breeze and the sound of the waves pounding the sand. I don't get to the beach nearly often enough, and it felt so good. Especially because I was there with my sisters and my mom!

I have two brothers still in Southern California. Lincoln is a dentist. Elliot and Lincoln's son, David, are best buddies. And Stella and cousin Sadie pick up right where they left off every single time. Cousin friends are the best kinds of friends.

My other Southern California brother is Matt, of Album Surf. We visited his shop in San Clemente and loaded up on Album stickers (which now cover everything in my house) and Album shirts and baby Helena smiles, too.

We spent a really nice morning with my grandparents, who live in Orange. I grew up just a minute away from them and their house still feels like home.

And of course, Ruby's! My cute sister-in-law, Mimi, snapped this photo of our crew. Fun times. Yummy veggie burgers.

Can't wait to go back.

recommitted

I've heard this quote from Marion G. Romney lots of times, but our stake president reminded me of it yesterday during our ward conference and I wanted to share it here: "I feel certain that if, in our homes, parents will read from the Book of Mormon prayerfully and regularly, both by themselves and with their children, the spirit of that great book will come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein. The spirit of reverence will increase; mutual respect and consideration for each other will grow. The spirit of contention will depart. Parents will counsel their children in greater love and wisdom. Children will be more responsive and submissive to the counsel of their parents. Righteousness will increase. Faith, hope, and charity --the pure love of Christ-- will abound in our homes and lives, bringing in their wake peace, joy, and happiness."

There are so many really wonderful promises in that little paragraph. We try to read the Book of Mormon together as a family during dinner, but hearing this quote again yesterday made me want to make sure we don't miss a night. I want the blessings that Elder Romney promised for my family, and I know that we can have them if we are faithful and diligent in our reading.

Something else that I loved that Elder Romney said in his talk: "If we would avoid adopting the evils of the world, we must pursue a course which will daily feed our minds with and call them back to the things of the Spirit. I know of no better way to do this than by daily reading the Book of Mormon."

I have read the Book of Mormon lots of times in my life, but I have really grown to love it the past few years (not coincidentally because I've made studying it, not just reading it, a higher priority in my life). I find answers to my questions on how to parent my children, how to love my neighbor, and how to follow Jesus Christ in its pages. I find strength to stay true to my religion, and most of all, I find peace.

I'd love to share a copy of it with you, if you'd like. Email me at barefootstephanie@gmail.com and I'll pop one in the mail to you!

happy weekend

Happy weekend, indeed! My kids and I had a really fun trip to California this week, but we are happy to be back at home with Mike. We have nothing at all planned for the next few days except sushi with friends and a whole lot of laundry and homework catch-up. It sounds really nice, actually.

If you read anything on the internet today, I hope it is this: In Defense of the Ordinary. And then have your kids read it, too.

A few excerpts: "Why isn't it enough to just be a kind person? Why can't we spend our time doing service hours because we love the Savior, not because we are trying to achieve the perfect college essay? Why can't we choose an extra-curricular or a class because we want to try it, not because it's going to help us reach some high goal or prove our worth? Not everyone is going to be the best at everything. In fact, very VERY few of us will be the best at anything. And that's ok.

"We are special because we are HIS. We are worthy because we were born. That is all that matters. And yes, that may make us average, in the sense that everyone qualifies for such a designation, but since when was that not enough?

"We should all strive for greatness, but we should expand its meaning and do it for ourselves, not society's expectations. It's about who we want to become, not who we want people to think we are. And it should be rooted in God's desires for us."

YES! Yes! Yes. I love this and I want my children to know it. Being kind and being good at loving others are far superior to maintaining a 4.0 GPA.

It's supposed to be rainy here this weekend. I always feel like baking when it's rainy. I made these whole wheat carrot muffins yesterday for the kids' afternoon snack. We are trying to get back to some good habits after our vacation and they really hit the spot.

Have a good weekend!

happy weekend

We have the eleven o'clock time slot at church this year, which makes walking to church much more appealing than the eight thirty slot. Plus the weather has been really fantastic. I love January. I hope it never ends.

Here's something exciting: Dandee is back to blogging! I have loved her blog for years and I am so happy that she is writing there again. I know blogging isn't as popular as it once was, but I will love it forever and ever.

I keep thinking I am going to get back on my no added sugar routine, but I have had the hardest time since the new year started. But! Every day is a new day and a fresh start and maybe today is the day. (But it's probably not.)

I've been working on lots of sewing projects lately, which means I have been watching quite a few shows. I made it through all of the seasons of the Great British Sewing Bee, and now I'm half way through Victoria. Great Britain makes the best tv. That's all there is to it.

Something I'm looking forward to this weekend: My sister is flying in to town and then we're driving to California together to see our other sister who is visiting there for a few days. Hooray!

I hope you have a fun weekend!

glasses! and contacts, too!

Right before Christmas, Stella started complaining that she couldn't see things far away very clearly. Funny thing: I had just bought her some little fake glasses to put in her stocking. But it turns out that she needed the real thing! After an eye exam, we ordered a home try on kit from Jonas Paul Eyewear (just like Warby Parker but for kids) and loved the Maddie. We placed our order, and just a few days later, her glasses were here! She was so excited to wear them to school, and to be able to see the chalkboard again.

Another funny thing: as excited as Stella was to get glasses, Mabel was just as excited to stop wearing hers. All she wanted for Christmas were contacts. :)

a five dollar solution

A couple of weeks ago, I realized that I had slipped back into the habit of looking at my phone right before I fell asleep at night and again as soon as I woke up the next morning. Instead of connecting with Mike or focusing on my prayers or thinking about the day ahead of me, I was scrolling through instagram. I didn't like the way that made me feel. So I picked up a little alarm clock at the store and I've started leaving my phone in the kitchen when I head to bed. It is a small thing, but it's made such a difference.

happy weekend

We spent last weekend in the mountains, just a couple of hours away, where there was a little bit of snow. It was so beautiful! We were severely underdressed, of course, but it sure was pretty. When I look out my window today at home, the sun is shining and warm, the grass is green, and the leaves are finally falling off all of the trees. Winter in Arizona is a little backwards, but it's my favorite.

I've been trying to think of small changes I can make, shifts in my habits, to help me accomplish my new year's resolution. I've been seeking inspiration in lots of places, and found some in this little video. My favorite part is when Josh talked about how any time spent with family can be quality time. Even if we are doing something mundane or small, we can do it together. Usually, I want to get my work done and move on to something else, but involving my kids can be a sweet experience. I need to remember that. And complimenting! Josh had lots of good advice on how to compliment our children. It is so important and sometimes it can feel a little awkward for me. I definitely need to work on that.

I like the idea of having one big, broad resolution for the year, but then finding small ways that I can accomplish it every day. This is new for me and it just feels right this year.

Today I have spent the morning puttering, and new year puttering is the best. I see my home with fresh eyes. Piles that have been languishing for months finally get put away. Furniture gets rearranged. Drawers get cleared. It feels really great.

Is it snowy and cold where you are? Or sunny and bright? Whatever the weather, I hope you have a happy weekend.

a new year

This is one of my favorite quotes from Jane Austen, and is excellent advice when contemplating a New Year's resolution, I've decided. This past week found me laid up with a cold, meaning I had lots of time to listen to the guide inside of myself as I thought about what I needed to work on this year. I believe we all have that guide, a conscience, or what my church refers to as "the Light of Christ," or if we have been baptized, "the Holy Ghost" inside of us. If we pay attention, it will tell us what is right or wrong or what we need to improve upon.

All of this reminds me of a great general conference talk, "What Lack I yet?" A perfect read as we begin this fresh, new year, it teaches that small changes in our attitude or habits can help us become more like our Heavenly Father. And really, all it takes are small, manageable changes, a little at a time. In his talk, Elder Lawrence said, "The Holy Ghost doesn't tell us to improve everything at once. If He did, we would become discouraged and give up. The Spirit works with us at our own speed, one step at a time, or as the Lord has taught, 'line upon line, precept upon precept. . .'"

I'm not going to share my resolution here, at least not just yet. I am still mulling it over, thinking and listening hard as I figure out how to proceed.

Have you determined your goals? Do you have a plan? Have you listened to your guide and felt impressed to improve in one area or another? I hope so and I wish you lots of luck!

the wise men

"As the Christmas season envelops us with all its glory, may we, as did the Wise Men, seek a bright, particular star to guide us to our Christmas opportunity in service to our fellowman.

"May we all make the journey to Bethlehem in spirit, taking with us a tender, caring heart as our gift to the Savior."

Thomas S. Monson


Merry Christmas, friends! We have gingerbread to bake and white elephant gifts to wrap and the nativity play to script and then we will be ready. I hope your home is filled with the peace that only He can bring this Christmas weekend.


More on the Wise Men here.

the babe, wrapped in swaddling clothes

I shared some of this last year, but I love it so much, I think it needs to be shared again.

From Elder Christofferson:

"When we talk about the birth of Jesus Christ, we appropriately reflect on what was to follow. His birth was infinitely significant because of the things He would experience and suffer so that He might better succor us--all culminating in His Crucifixion and Resurrection. But His mission also included the beauty of His service, the miracles of His ministry, the relief He brought to the suffering, and the joy He offered--and still offers--to the mourning.

"With all of that to come, though, I think it's appropriate this time of year to just think about that baby in the manger. Don't be too overwhelmed or occupied with what is to come; just think about that little baby. Take a quiet, peaceful moment to ponder the beginning of His life--the culmination of heavenly prophecy but the earthly beginning for Him.

"Take time to relax, be at peace, and see this little child in your mind. Do not be too concerned or overwhelmed with what is coming in His life or in yours. Instead, take a peaceful moment to contemplate perhaps the most serene moment in the history of the world--when all of heaven rejoiced with the message 'Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.'"

I'm about to leave for a run, and while I am running, I am going to try hard to think about that little baby. There are a million things I can be doing today--cleaning my house, last minute errands, working on a sewing job, etc. But I am going to set those things aside, at least for a little while, and focus on that quiet and small moment in the history of the world, when a little babe was born in an insignificant town, long, long ago.

As Elder Christofferson recommends, I am going to "sit (or in my case, run) for a few quiet moments and let the Savior's Spirit warm you and reassure you of the worthiness of your service, of your offering, of your life. Sit quietly with that little baby and come away spiritually strengthened and better prepared for all that is going to come later. Let that moment be one of rest and refreshing and reassurance and renewal."

Happy Wednesday, friends.


My favorite painting, a gift, of course from the talented Beth Allen.