fast

The first Sunday of every month is fast Sunday in the Mormon church. That means we skip two consecutive meals, donate the money we would have spent on those meals to help the poor, and focus on coming closer to Heavenly Father. Sometimes more than prayer is needed to find the answers we seek. Sometimes we need the combined faith of our family or congregation, unified toward a specific goal or cause. This is when fasting, along with prayer, is helpful. Fasting is something we do to show Heavenly Father that we are willing to sacrifice for needed blessings, to improve our communication with Him, and to improve ourselves.

Today is fast Sunday and I am thankful for the opportunity to unite my prayers and faith with the members in my congregation for a specific purpose. When I fast, I feel like I am more sensitive to the Spirit. I feel like my prayers become more heartfelt and more sincere. When I spend my day focused on finding answers, instead of feeding my body, the answers seem to come more easily. It is a blessing, and one that I am grateful for each month.

(Also, it keeps my kitchen really clean. I am thankful for that, too.)

You can learn more about fasting here.

the plan

Mike and I spent the morning at the funeral for our neighbor, a young 33 year old father of three whose life ended after a brave two year battle with cancer. I have been in a position to help his wife for the past few months and I have marveled at her strength and courage. But today was a hard day. In the midst of sorrow, however, there is hope--hope for an eternity together for this family who was separated prematurely. Hope for brighter, happier days ahead, all made possible through the sacrifice of our Savior. I am thankful for the Plan of Happiness. Death is part of this plan, but I believe that because of Jesus Christ, death is just a doorway back to our Heavenly Father's presence. This belief brings me peace and comfort during difficult times, and I am thankful for it.

To learn more about what Mormons believe about life after death, look here.

Photo of the pretty skies above the Mogollon Rim.

mco and a happy weekend

I know I've talked about this before, but Mabel sings with the Millennial Choir and Orchestra. This dominates our Thursday nights, as we spend our evening far from home, waiting for her to rehearse. The director of the choir requires perfection from the participants, and they rise to it, every time. I am thankful that we are able to provide this experience for Mabel. I have seen her singing ability and her faith in Jesus Christ grow as she sings the songs of His birth, and I gratefully sacrifice our Thursday evenings for it.

If you live in Dallas, Utah, Idaho, Orange County, California, or here in Arizona, you can find information about their Christmas concerts here. This concert is always a highlight of the Christmas season for me, and I highly recommend attending a performance if possible.

I started listening to Christmas music yesterday while I was doing some alterations, and I don't regret it one bit. I love Thanksgiving, and I am in no hurry to get to December, but filling my home with Christmas music just feels right. It definitely put me in a merry mood.

We are looking forward to perfect weather this weekend, time off of school, and hopefully a date night. How about you?

Have a happy weekend!

rain

We woke up to a cool breeze and a ground wet from an early morning rain. I can't tell you what a pleasure it is to have nice weather after so many months of heat. My windows are open and the breeze is blowing through the house, making everything feel fresh and new. I am thankful to live in this desert, despite its difficult summers, for there is no where else I'd rather be. But I am most grateful for the change in season. We are entering into our other season here, the nice one, and it makes me so happy!

all by myself

When Mike decided to go back to school, I was excited for him. I knew he would learn all sorts of important things and have many new experiences. I knew he would stretch and grow. What I didn't realize is that I would, too. I've always been an independent, do-it-yourself kind of person, but I feel like I have to take it to the next level now that Mike is rarely home. Everything that has to do with running our home and family sits squarely on my shoulders. (Minus the finances. Thankfully, Mike still handles those.) The other day, I changed the tube on Stella's bike all by myself. Yesterday, I even braved Costco alone. Ha! I know this is crazy, but I had never been there without Mike before. Costco trips were always a family affair. But our Costco list was getting longer by the day and Mike's load this quarter isn't letting up, so I bit the bullet and wandered the aisles alone.

Sometimes this feels really hard, but I find that if I decide to be thankful for the opportunity to stretch and grow, it doesn't feel so quite so burdensome. I know life isn't meant to be easy all of the time, and I am grateful for this season in my life where I get to learn how to do some hard things all by myself.


I realize there are many women who are truly mothering alone, whether because of divorce or death or military service, or other reasons. These women are my heroes and they have my deepest respect. I am grateful that Mike comes home from school each day (even if it's after the kids are in bed).

a month of thanksgiving

Happy November! It's my most favorite month of the whole year! Not only does our weather improve drastically in November, but today marks the beginning of my month of Thanksgiving. Every year, during the month of November, I focus on gratitude, and then I post here on my blog something I am thankful for, every day for the whole month. I've been doing it for years and it's the best thing I do for myself. It puts my challenges into perspective, makes me more content, and definitely brings me a lot of joy. Plus, feeling extreme gratitude and contentment is a really great way to enter the holiday season. Have you ever tried it? Why don't you do it along with me? I promise you will see a happy difference in your life.

And so, I am thankful for November, for the opportunity it gives me to take stock of my life and focus on all of the really fortunate blessings I've been given.

Here's a quick look at our Halloween:

We had Kip from Napoleon Dynamite and a banana.

And a really sweet Dorothy and an Obi Wan Kanobi.

The kids had a lot of fun, but I am always so glad when Halloween is over. :)

family

In lieu of a conference report today, I thought I'd share two great quotes about families. This one above is from Elder Maxwell and reminds me of the importance of my role at home. The work I do here is simple and mostly mundane, but it is the most important work of my life.

And if I wasn't already a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I think I'd join just for the visiting teaching program. Every woman in our church is assigned a partner and a few other women to visit and teach. Every month, we are encouraged to visit these sisters in their homes and share a message with them. But it's so much more than that. Friendship and love grows, service is given, and hearts are touched. This month's visiting teaching message included the following quote from Julie B. Beck, the former Relief Society (women's organization) president:

"The creation of the earth provided a place where families could live. God created a man and a woman who were the two essential halves of a family. It was part of Heavenly Father's plan that Adam and Eve be sealed and form an eternal family. The fall made it possible for them to have sons and daughters. Christ's Atonement allows for the family to be sealed together eternally. It allows for families to have eternal growth and perfection. The plan of happiness, also called the plan of salvation, was created for families. This was Christ's doctrine. Without the family, there is no plan; there is no reason for mortal life."

This is it. This is everything. This life at home is the reason I am here. I really believe that! So when I am feeling bogged down, or discouraged, or unappreciated, I am going to come back and reread these quotes. And then I'll get up and get back to work.

For more about the purpose of families, look here.

Pretty graphic from Allison Kimball.


Have a safe Halloween!

happy weekend

Oliver built a pretty epic cup tower last night. Elliot was crazy about it. Literally crazy. Ha!

Hooray for the weekend! I feel like we are really earning our weekends these days. Friday gets here and we all sigh with relief. We did it! We made it through another week! Phew.

I'm going to put 37 down as the year my body gave up on me. I was running the other day and realized that it was more of a shuffle than a run and I honestly couldn't pick up the pace. That was as fast as I could go! And I wake up with sore hand joints every morning. Does this happen to you, too? I've heard fish oil helps, but haven't committed to it yet. I've never minded getting older, but now I'm not so sure. My friend, Sarah, posted about this book about aging. I think I need to check it out.

I made this baked oatmeal this week and replaced the sugar with two mashed ripe bananas and it was delicious. There is still a sprinkling of brown sugar on top, which gives it just the right amount of crunchy sweetness. Someday, if I keep trying, my kids won't leave a pile of raisins at the bottom of their bowls, right?

This article made me laugh.

And I've seen this one floating around Facebook. Mike once went to a meeting where a family therapist was speaking about pornography. He said that smart phones were the worst thing that had ever happened to his practice. Our daughter, Mabel, is 14 and every single one of her friends has a smart phone. She doesn't even have a phone yet! I tell her she'll thank us someday. That's totally what teenagers want to hear, I'm sure. Do you have thoughts on this?

I have halloween costumes to sew and halloween party lip sync moves to memorize today. What are you up to?

Have a fun weekend!

a mid week update

I want you to know that forgetting yourself in service for someone else really works. I came home from helping a neighbor on Monday and my life felt so manageable (it is manageable, I was just having a small freak out). I have always known this, but it was nice to be reminded of it. I am grateful for the opportunity to serve. Really and truly. It is the best medicine.

Good news. I finished sewing one of the three halloween costumes that require my needle this Halloween season. It is pink and shiny and really twirly, and no, it's not for Stella! Mike and I are going to a Halloween party this weekend and costumes are required. Speaking of Stella, she had the hardest time deciding on a costume this year. After many internet searches and a family vote, she finally chose one, so I am headed to the fabric store today in search of blue gingham.

Bad news. Our cat brought in another rat last night. Luckily it was before we had fallen asleep. I heard the tell tale signs in the hall outside our bedroom, and sure enough, there it was, quivering with fear in the clutches of our cat, starting at me with its beady black eyes. It's become so common, I don't even scream anymore. Into the trap it went and off to our neighbor, who so kindly disposes of them for us. It's a team effort, this ridding our neighborhood of the rats.

If you're near a Krispy Kreme, stop by for some pumpkin spice doughnuts. Today only!

cute printable from Alexa Zurcher

christian love and service

Yesterday, I was feeling low. I don't often feel this way, but I was feeling overwhelmed by my heavy load at home while Mike is in school, and by an assignment I have been given at church. Like, so overwhelmed that I almost felt paralyzed and a little panicky and I wanted to cry. This could very well be hormonal. In fact, I am going to blame it on hormones 100%, but that doesn't make it any easier. What does make it easier is the fact that I have a very capable partner in my assignment at church and many women in my neighborhood who are willing to help in that assignment, and that Mike is at least home on the weekends, which eases the burden on me a little. In an effort to feel better, I searched the most recent General Conference addresses to find one that would speak to me and this difficult assignment and time in my life. I found it in Elder Robert D. Hales' talk, "Come, Follow Me" by Practicing Christian Love and Service.

Elder Hales begins by saying, "When the Savior called His disciples to follow Him, they were living the law of Moses, including seeking 'an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth,' but the Savior came to fulfill that law with His Atonement. He taught a new doctrine: 'Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.'

"The disciples were taught to turn from the ways of the natural man to the loving and caring ways of the Savior by replacing contention with forgiveness, kindness, and compassion. The 'new commandment' to 'love one another' was not always easy to keep. When the disciples worried about associating with sinners and certain classes of people, the Savior patiently taught, 'Inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.' Or, as a Book of Mormon prophet explained, 'When ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.'

"As the Savior's latter-day disciples, we come unto Him by loving and serving God's children. As we do, we may not be able to avoid tribulation, affliction, and suffering in the flesh, but we will suffer less spiritually. Even in our trials, we can experience joy and peace."

Elder Hales then goes on to talk about how Christian love and service naturally begin in the home. He gives lots of good advice about taking advantage of teaching moments in our own families and reminding us that holding a consistent family home evening, family prayer, and family scripture study can be some of our most impactful Christian service. Maybe I need to recommit to making these practices a priority in my home, even if I'm the only parent here to make them happen. His promise brought me lots of comfort: "The calling to be a parent includes the gift to teach in the ways that are right for you and for your children."

And then he says, "If you are suffering deeply, with others or alone, I urge you to let the Savior be your caregiver. Lean on His ample arm. Accept His assurance. 'I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you,' He promises."

As I fulfill my assignment in the coming weeks, and as I continue to run our home alone while Mike spends long hours at school, I am going to try to remember that it is through Christian love and service that I come to follow Christ. And while that service might be difficult or inconvenient, and most definitely a sacrifice, if I give it with a willing heart, with love for those I serve, I know I will be blessed. And it won't feel like such a sacrifice anymore.


At least my bed is made. It's the first thing I did when I woke up this morning and I already feel a million times better.


Read, watch, or listen to the entire talk here.

happy weekend

I think Elliot really thought he could beat Mike at stick pull the other night during Stella's volleyball practice. He certainly gave it everything he had. Look at that face! Mike surprised us and showed up at Stella's practice. We seriously never see him anymore, he is so busy at school. Honestly, I feel like a single mom most of the time. (I have enormous respect for real single moms. You are strong, capable ladies.) It is hard but it will be worth it, I think.

A list of things I have found upon waking in the last three weeks:
a bat flying around my kitchen
a rat hiding under my kitchen table
a rat under our dresser, being chased by our cat*
and the worst one-- a rat trying to escape out my opened but screened bedroom window, inches from my head.*

*occurred in the middle of the night

Our cat is officially (I mean it this time) fired. It used to drive me nuts that she'd bring dead birds and lizards into the house, but I'd take that over the live animals she's been bringing in lately. I can't even. . . I mean, I'm just glad we found and caught these things before Mike left for the day. Otherwise I'd really have to put my brave face on, and I don't think I could do it.

Have your kids picked out their Halloween costumes yet? We are still trying to decide on a few at our house, but time is running out!

Some recipes I tried and at least half of us liked this week: Ree's Quinoa with Buttery Roasted Vegetables (I doubled the vegetables), Ree's Veggie Tortellini Soup (this came together in like 20 minutes), Cha Cha's White Chicken Chili (minus the jalapeno), and Pumpkin Magic Cake (go heavy on the glaze).

I wish I could say it felt like fall here, but we have another week or so of hot (and I mean hot) weather. And then, then, it will be in the 70s! Happy day.

I hope you have a good weekend full of fall things. We have the school carnival, which is always a good time.

apple sharlotka

Have I mentioned that Mabel has fully taken the reigns of our family baking (minus the bread--I still do that)? It is the best. She eagerly awaits our turn to bring dessert to Sunday dinner, and this past Sunday she made a really great apple cake. It was simple and light and not too sweet. I thought I'd share the recipe here in case you want to try it.

Apple Sharlotka

6 large Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored, and cut into medium sized chunks
3 eggs
3/4 cup of granulated sugar
1/4 cup of brown sugar
1 teaspoon of vanilla
1 cup of flour
1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon of salt
1/8 teaspoon of nutmeg
cinnamon and powdered sugar to sprinkle on top

In a large bowl, mix the eggs and sugars until thick ribbons form on the surface of the beaten eggs. Beat in the vanilla. Then stir in the flour, cinnamon, salt, and nutmeg until just combined. It should be very thick. Add the apple chunks and mix well.

Pour everything into a nicely greased 9 inch springform pan and bake in a 350 degree oven for about an hour, or until a tester comes out clean. Dust with more cinnamon. Sprinkle with powdered sugar before serving.

We ate ours warm with whipped cream, but I think it'd be really great with a scoop of vanilla ice cream.

Original recipe from smitten kitchen here.

joy

I think the talks at General Conference are always so well suited to the times in which we live, but none more so than Elder Nelson's most recent talk, "Joy and Spiritual Survival."

He said, "As conflicts between nations escalate, as cowardly terrorists pray on the innocent, and as corruption in everything from business to government becomes increasingly commonplace, what can help us? What can help each of us with our personal struggles and with the rigorous challenge of living in these latter days?"

His answer is simple. The prophet Lehi, in the Book of Mormon, "declared boldly and without reservation a principle as revealed by the Lord: 'Men are, that they might have joy.' Imagine! Of all the words he could have used to describe the nature and purpose of our lives here in mortality, he chose the word joy!

"Life is filled with detours and dead ends, trials and challenges of every kind. Each of us has likely had times when distress, anguish, and despair almost consumed us. Yet we are here to have joy?

"Yes! The answer is a resounding yes! But how is that possible? And what must we do to claim the joy that Heavenly Father has in store for us?"

Elder Nelson teaches us that our ability to have joy, even in the face of adversity, has nothing to do with the circumstances of our lives, but everything to do with the focus on our lives.

He said, "When the focus of our lives is on God's plan of salvation, we can feel joy regardless of what is happening--or not happening--in our lives. Joy comes from and because of Him. He is the source of all joy."

"Just as the Savior offers peace that 'passeth all understanding,' He also offers an intensity, depth, and breadth of joy that defy human logic or mortal comprehension. For example, it doesn't seem possible to feel joy when your child suffers with an incurable illness or when you lose your job or when your spouse betrays you. Yet that is precisely the joy the Savior offers. His joy is constant, assuring us that our 'afflictions shall be but a small moment' and be consecrated to our gain."

To claim that joy, we must turn to Jesus Christ. We can be grateful for Him and for His sacrifice, and we can live in a way that makes us worthy of that great blessing. As we learn of Him and follow Him, He will become more real to us, and in that knowledge, the joy He promises will increase.

I know this is true. I have felt the joy that comes from faith in Jesus Christ. It has lightened my load and helped me to carry on when things were difficult. I hope you have felt that, too.

There is so much more goodness in this talk. You can read, watch, or listen to the entire thing here.


I had a big smile on my face all day yesterday because Mike was released from his very time consuming calling at church. The fact that he was home in the morning and was able to go to church with us instead of hours ahead of us definitely required a celebratory pre-church photo. And I feel like I need to clarify: Mike's shirt is blue, not purple. Weird instagram filter consequence.

happy weekend

I was really excited about having everyone home this week. And now that it's Friday, I'm really looking forward to everyone going back to school. Ha! Mostly, I just want my house to be clean again, which is impossible when everyone is home all the time. If I'm being honest, that's probably the number one reason why I could never homeschool. A clean house equals a calm Stephanie.

But I do feel like we made some good memories on our break, and I am grateful for that.

Here's the best news: my little sister, Julianne, had a baby girl! Little Helena Rose was born in Washington DC the other day and is already beloved by all who know her (or who live too far away and have only seen pictures of her). Yay for new cousins! We lucked out with two new baby girl cousins this month. It's appeasing Mike's baby hunger just a bit.

Ok guys, who are you voting for? I am completely sick of it, but also, I really need to figure it out. Who are you thinking and why? Please?

I hope you have a good, autumn-y weekend!

cabin life

Mike's parents have a cabin in the mountains, about two and a half hours away. Since Mike and the kids are off on fall break this week, we spent a few days there unwinding in the cool, non-internet connected air.

Cabin life means pulling out our warmest clothes and realizing that we don't have any warm clothes.

It means long walks in the evenings.

And two out of four kids who willingly pose for photos.

Cabin life means at least one night around the fire pit roasting marshmallows.

And it means lots of lazy afternoons, reading books or playing games.

My favorite thing about going to the cabin is seeing my kids happy together. They genuinely get along with each other, and I love the bonds of friendship they form when it's just our little family without any distractions. If I was an emoji, I'd have all the heart eyes.

And now I think we are ready to get back at it. Maybe? Well, after this weekend, for sure. School (and all the housework), here we come. In a few days. :)