for mondays

On Mondays I give myself a break. I ease myself in to the new week. I go down to the basement to assess the weekend mess and I tidy, but I don't clean. I look at my schedule and set my priorities. I do not let myself feel overwhelmed.

I am thankful for this weekend-recovery day. I try to spend it at home, in the quiet stillness of an empty house, putting everything back together again.

for staying home

I always wanted to be a stay at home mom. I never had lofty career goals or plans. I still don't. Staying home looks different than it used to, now that my kids are getting older, but this quote from Linda K. Burton still rings true:

"Mothers decide to stay home not just because they are tired of juggling family and career; not just because they want to 'be there' for the first word and the first step; not just because they have found that a rich home life requires persistent personal investment.

"They want to be home because in some quiet moment caring for their children, they have suddenly experienced the vastness, the intricacies, the delicate nature of this work. While performing some entirely routine act of nurturing, they have unexpectedly stumbled on a moment of insight so luminous as to reveal with imposing clarity that the greatest opportunity for success they might ever have is nestled right there in their arms.

"And in the midst of a thousand previous assumptions about life and love, in an instant that no one else can measure or see, they decided that this uncertain business of trying to guide childish innocent into adult wisdom is an art worth of extraordinary exertion and time."

I am thankful that I am able to be home for my family. It is what suits us best, and I am grateful that we have the means and resources to make it possible.

for a freshly cut lawn

Our winter grass was ready for its first trimming today. I was sort of dreading it, as it is hard, sweaty work with our old push mower. But! Then Mike reminded me that we have Oliver, who is fully capable of mowing the lawn. And my sister-in-law let us borrow their electric mower, which made the job so much easier. Today is a beautiful day, and I am thankful for hardworking kids and generous family (and really pretty grass, too).

for enough

I don't really like cooking dinner. It is one household chore that I'd gladly skip if I could. But tonight our young women's group went to Feed My Starving Children to pack meals for impoverished people in the Philippines and it was a good reminder of how blessed I am that I am able to feed my children every day. I don't know why I was born into this place and time, where I have enough while so many others in the world do not. But it's good to remember and hopefully in the remembering I will be more generous with my own resources. And maybe I won't mind cooking dinner so much anymore. I am feeling grateful to have enough and some to spare tonight.

for convenience

Laundry is one household task that I don't mind. I like taking a pile of dirty, wrinkled clothes and turning it into a clean, nicely folded and stacked pile. But I think if I had to wash them all by hand or go to a laundromat, it would be a different story. Ha! I did six loads of laundry today (including all of the sheets), and I am feeling really grateful for the washing machine and dryer that sit in my laundry room.

what's for dinner

When I am really on my game, I prepare dinner in the morning. Our afternoons are busy and I love having dinner ready to go before everyone gets home from school and the afternoon rush begins. We are trying to eat a plant based diet these days. Low dairy, very low meat, high whole grains and fruits and vegetables. Tonight we're having the Pioneer Woman's Quinoa with Buttery Roasted Vegetables. It might not feel like fall outside yet (still in the upper 90s here in Arizona-blah), but it's the season for roasted vegetables and I couldn't be happier.

I've made this recipe before and loved it, but I'll be honest and tell you that I make sure to serve it with lots of whole wheat toast so that Oliver doesn't go to bed hungry. :)

happy weekend

I think I've forgotten how to blog, and I'm ok with that.

We rearranged our family room yesterday. Our tv was broken (thanks to an errant magna tile), so we took it down and moved everything around. Lest you think we are virtuously going without a tv from now on, we picked up a new (bigger) one at Costco last night. Rearranging furniture is near the top of my list of favorite home improvements and I keep walking down to the basement just to see the new set up again.

This morning felt a little bit like Christmas, as our nighttime low finally dipped down to the 70s. Hot afternoons are much more bearable when I can open my windows at night. We are heading in to the best six months in Arizona and I can't wait.

I made these pumpkin muffins to celebrate.

Have a happy weekend!

happy weekend

Yesterday we had a whopper of a monsoon. It is so amazing to have the temperature drop 30 degrees in a few minutes as the rain (and hail) start pouring out of the sky. It's just about the only time you see kids playing in the street in the summer. It is a welcome change, even with the humidity it brings.

I told myself this week that I didn't have to do anything. That I was just going to enjoy our last week of summer and relax. I did do a lot of that, but I also got busy cleaning out cupboards and junk drawers and my entire sewing room. I'm not sure what came over me. It was the most energy I've had all summer. Maybe because I gave myself permission to relax? Who knows, but I sure love walking by my sewing room and seeing it spic and span.

I'm teaching the Young Women on Sunday. The lesson is on why family is important. I don't usually look forward to my turn to teach, but I am excited to get into this topic with them. This whole month is full of really great lesson topics, actually. I am grateful to belong to a church that believes in and teaches these things to our youth.

Well, Oliver will be happy to know that because of the rain yesterday, the grass was too soggy to mow this morning. He had no idea I was going to wake him up early to work on it. We'll have to do that tomorrow, I guess. :) We need to get back in to the habit of waking up early, anyway. 5:00 wake up calls are coming soon!

Have a happy weekend.

more like Mary

 

These are the busiest days of my motherhood, and I don't think things are going to slow down. As my children get older and are more involved in school and sports and music and church and everything else that is beneficial and good, I think this will become the norm. I have never been a "busy" person, and so this new reality has been a difficult adjustment for me. But I had a revelation at the temple this morning and I'd like to share it here.

I have always been uncomfortable with the story of Mary and Martha. Remember, when Jesus Christ came to their house, Martha got busy. There was legitimate work that needed to be done to prepare for and accommodate His visit, and she was going to see that it was completed. Mary, on the other hand, ignored the work and sat at the Savior's feet. I have always been a Martha, and so when the Savior gently rebuked her for complaining that Mary wasn't helping, I couldn't help but take a small bit of offense. But I am beginning to see that sometimes (all the times), I need to be a Mary.

So when there is housework to be done and children to shuttle and food to prepare and so much sewing to do, I can't lose sight of the most important work--the spiritual and holy work--for myself and my family. On our busiest days, I need to set aside those less important things to make sure I am making time for personal and family scripture study, for meaningful personal and family prayer, and for things like Family Home Evening, family councils, and church callings.

I was feeling particularly burdened by my load this morning and thought about skipping my weekly temple time to get some work done. But I remembered the commitment I had made to my Heavenly Father to get to the temple as often as I can, and I remembered how great I feel when I visit the temple, so I went. And in the midst of my worry and weariness, the Spirit taught me (as it does every time I let it).

Here's to being more like Mary, for setting aside more time for holiness and for worrying a little less about the less important things.

happy weekend

I went downstairs to make the kids' beds yesterday morning (as I do every morning) and found Elliot's bed already made! What a kid. He won the prize for favorite yesterday for sure. Cleaning is totally the way to my heart.

This week I pulled out a dress pattern I've had (and have never used) since high school. It's been a long time since I've sewn something for myself, and I had such a good time working on it. The funny thing about sewing clothing is that you are making a decision based on a picture. Then you spend lots and lots of hours constructing something that you might not even like once it's finished! Ha! Good thing I like the dress I just spent all week making. I've made lots of things in the past that I ended up not liking, and that's no fun.

Don't forget about Women's Conference tomorrow! You can see how to watch it here. It's always such a nice, uplifting meeting. I look forward to watching it with my girls.

Is it snowing at your house? We had a little dip in the temperature here, which feels like our last hurrah before the heat comes. I'll take 70 and breezy over 94 in March any day.

Have a happy weekend!

on a monday

I'm putting my house back together one room at a time today. I got an early start on the kitchen. While I was steaming the floor, I listened to the third chapter of Teachings of Presidents of the Church, Gordon B. Hinckley. I had to share this quote:

"There is a terrible ailment of pessimism in the land. It's almost endemic. We're constantly fed a steady and sour diet of character assassination, faultfinding, evil speaking of one another. ...

"I come with a plea that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I'm suggesting that we accentuate the positive. I'm asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment virtue and effort.

"I am not asking that all criticism be silent. Growth comes with correction. Strength comes with repentance. Wise is the man or woman who, committing mistakes pointed out by others, changes his or her course. I am not suggesting that our conversation be all honey. Clever expression that is sincere and honest is a skill to be sought and cultivated. What I am suggesting and asking is that we turn from the negativism that so permeates our society and look for the remarkable good in the land and times in which we live, that we speak of one another's virtues more than we speak of one another's faults, that optimism replace pessimism. Let our faith replace our fears.

"We have every reason to be optimistic in this world. Tragedy is around, yes. Problems everywhere, yes. But ... you can't, you don't, build out of pessimism or cynicism. You look with optimism, work with faith, and things happen.

"Do not despair. Do not give up. Look for the sunlight through the clouds. Opportunities will eventually open to you. Do not let the prophets of gloom endanger your possibilities."

What a great way to start a new week! I hope your Monday is a happy one.

happy weekend

See that chair behind Stella? That's where our Christmas tree is supposed to be, but we haven't had time to pick one up yet! Crossing my fingers it happens tomorrow. I think this is the latest we've ever gotten a tree and I am totally missing it. The pine scent I have in my wax melter thingy just isn't cutting it.

For the first time in a long time I didn't worry about cleaning my house this week. I mean, I picked up and tidied and cleaned the kitchen every night, but I didn't dust or do the bathrooms and it was sort of liberating. I just had other stuff to do, you know? Things like hiking Camelback with a friend or going to the temple or watching the Great British Sewing Bee. Important stuff!

If you are in town, don't miss the Mesa Temple Lights. We're hoping to be there tonight with hot chocolate and doughnuts.

Today's Light the World is: Jesus Visited the Lonely and So Can You. My favorite, totally easy and do-able idea: Send a friendly text to someone who could use a boost. No one come to mind? Pray and ask God for someone that needs an uplifting text. Another idea is to write a letter to someone who is living away from home. My kids and I are going to write letters to the missionaries serving from our ward after school today. Have I mentioned how much I love this Christmas advent?! I love it.

Have a merry weekend!

plenty

Yesterday I went to the grocery store to stock up my pantry and to get Thanksgiving supplies. This morning I put my turkey in the brine, and this afternoon I will bake a pie. This is the season of plenty, and I am thankful that my family and I have enough. Too many people in this world don't, and I feel very fortunate that I am able to feed and dress and house my children as comfortably as I can. Comfort is a luxury, and I am thankful for ours. I hope acknowledging this will help me be more generous, especially this holiday season. 

Have a happy Thanksgiving!

all by myself

When Mike decided to go back to school, I was excited for him. I knew he would learn all sorts of important things and have many new experiences. I knew he would stretch and grow. What I didn't realize is that I would, too. I've always been an independent, do-it-yourself kind of person, but I feel like I have to take it to the next level now that Mike is rarely home. Everything that has to do with running our home and family sits squarely on my shoulders. (Minus the finances. Thankfully, Mike still handles those.) The other day, I changed the tube on Stella's bike all by myself. Yesterday, I even braved Costco alone. Ha! I know this is crazy, but I had never been there without Mike before. Costco trips were always a family affair. But our Costco list was getting longer by the day and Mike's load this quarter isn't letting up, so I bit the bullet and wandered the aisles alone.

Sometimes this feels really hard, but I find that if I decide to be thankful for the opportunity to stretch and grow, it doesn't feel so quite so burdensome. I know life isn't meant to be easy all of the time, and I am grateful for this season in my life where I get to learn how to do some hard things all by myself.


I realize there are many women who are truly mothering alone, whether because of divorce or death or military service, or other reasons. These women are my heroes and they have my deepest respect. I am grateful that Mike comes home from school each day (even if it's after the kids are in bed).

a mud room

Ok, so technically, if you live in Arizona, you don't need a mud room. This room will likely never see a spec of mud. Dust, yes. Maybe even a scorpion or a rat, or two, but never mud. We call it our little office, and this teeny room off of our kitchen has had lots of different lives in the 10 years we've lived in this house (from laundry room to sewing room to office and back again). I've wanted to build in a bench beneath our pretty antique hooks for a long time, and I finally found the energy to do it.

I used a Kallax shelf from Ikea, in white, placed on its side as the base of my bench. I had to raise it up about five inches, so that the baseboard would fit properly, so first I built a platform for it. Once I secured it to the platform, I used the wall brackets that came with the shelf to secure it to the wall.

The shelf wasn't quite as long as I would have hoped, so I added some bead board to enclose the empty space beside it to make it one long, six foot bench. It kind of drives me crazy that the cubbies are off center, but I've let it go. I had my kids fill out questionnaires about themselves and stuck them with a family photo in the space to make a little time capsule. It will be so fun to find in 20 years when we change our minds about this room again!

I stained some plain boards to match the antique hooks and screwed them in place on top of the shelf. I am no carpenter, but I think they'll do.

I love the clean white bead board. It brightens the whole space. And Stella's little work area has everything she needs. She is an avid letter writer and drawer and homework do-er.

But let's be real. Because mud rooms never ever look the way they do on pinterest in real life, here's a shot of the current (and constant) state of that pretty bench. Backpacks everywhere! But at least I'm not tripping on them in the kitchen anymore.

in favor of bed making

Do you make your bed everyday? The admiral in this video claims that if you want to change the world, you need to start by making your bed. I've never thought about it that way, but I'm with him!

happy weekend

Well, we are three days into the new school year and I have to be honest, I feel a little out of sorts. I didn't expect to feel this way! I'm a little lost. The good news is that my house is really clean. The bad news is that I've spent the past two days doing nothing but cleaning. I don't want to spend all my time cleaning. Time to reread this post, I guess.

Here's the school report: Mabel says high school is a glorified eighth grade and is underwhelming. Phew! Oliver's bus leaves later than last year, giving him about half an hour more sleep in the mornings. In classic Stella fashion, she says things are "great." And Elliot is really, really tired. Good thing tomorrow is the weekend and he can rest up.

My kids are dying to see Pete's Dragon this weekend, but I kind of just want to veg in front of the olympics. Doesn't that sound nice?

Here's something good: Rubygirl.org. My sister introduced me to it. It's a wonderful, uplifting, and positive place for girls (and women, too!). From their site, Rubygirl is a place where "young women from all over the world gather to exchange ideas, work through problems, share faith, and build friendships. . . We hope to encourage writing as a tool for spiritual, personal, and emotional development." I subscribed Mabel to their feed. She spends a lot of time online, and Rubygirl seems like a better place to browse than pinterest, you know?

Have a happy one!

happy weekend

Summers are for cleaning out closets, and organizing bedrooms, and getting rid of junk. At least at our house they are. I found this guy at Target the other day. I painted him with about 6 coats of white paint and now Mabel has a handy spot to hang her flower crowns. (This is her reduced collection, by the way, after I made her toss half of them.) I love making small changes like this. I rearranged the couch in our family room a few weeks ago, and it still feels fresh and new.

Here's the bad news: it's going to be 120 degrees here this weekend. 120 degrees! That's record-breaking heat. I am sad for our plants. They are already looking a little peaky, and a week of intense heat isn't going to help. Why do we live here, again? Quick, someone remind me how wonderful our winters are. Sheesh.

Some good news: it's almost Father's Day! And that means we get to celebrate Mike and our dads/grandpas and show our gratitude for all they do for our family. We are lucky to have these wonderful men in our lives, and I hope they feel extra special on Sunday. (We got Mike this shirt because we are weird.)

Have a happy (and hopefully cooler) weekend!

happy weekend

We call stuffed animals "guys" at our house, and Elliot is my lover of guys. His beloved Wolfie is getting pretty thin and floppy these days from all of the love. So this week, when I was paining my bedroom, I took my old guy, Nosey-Nosey, out of the shadowbox that usually hangs on my wall and let Elliot play with him. As I placed Nosey in Elliot's arms, he let out the sweetest, most reverent gasp. And then he handled Nosey so delicately. Nosey got to meet the rest of our guys, and I think everyone had a really great time together. I even heard Elliot bringing Wolfie into my room this morning to say hello to Nosey, where he is safely back up on the wall.

I painted my bedroom, which I've wanted to do since we painted it green ten years ago when we moved in to our house. I've barely tolerated that green all this time, and it feels really good to have it be a nice, clean, bright white instead. Funny thing, though, I painted it and moved all the furniture back in place and cleaned everything up. . . and then I realized that it needed a second coat. Blerg! So the next day, I did it all over again.

Painting is not my favorite, but it is cheap and it makes a big impact. We painted every square inch of our house when we moved in, and we've almost painted it all again since.

Our spring break kicks off this weekend. I am trying to convince Mike to take us to California for a few days. I'd really love to visit my grandparents and look at the ocean for a minute. Oh, and breathe that wet, salty air that feels so much like home!

We'll see. . .

Have a good weekend!

p.s. Best home makeover I've seen in a long time.

on the wise use of time, part 2

As a stay-at-home mom, I feel like one of my biggest challenges is choosing how to spend my time. In this stage of my life, my time is really my own, but sometimes that can feel overwhelming. You know, I could spend all day cleaning my house, or all day exercising, or all day sitting on the couch looking at instagram. But those aren't good ideas, obviously. So how do I manage it? How do I choose what is best?

For this week's Conference Report, I've chosen three really great articles that all touch on aspects of this time management conundrum. I'll just share my favorite parts.

In 2007, then general Relief Society president, Julie B. Beck, gave the memorable talk, "Mothers Who Know". In it she said, "Mothers who know do less. They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home. Mothers who know are willing to live on less and consume less of the world's goods in order to spend more time with their children--more time eating together, more time working together, more time reading together, more time talking, laughing, singing, exemplifying. These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all."

Also, "These wise mothers who know are selective about their own activities and involvement to conserve their limited strength in order to maximize their influence where it matters most."

In the same general conference, Elder Oaks gave the talk, "Good, Better, Best". Oh, this talk is chalk full of good advice. I had a hard time narrowing it down to just a couple quotes to share here. But these were my favorite: "Most of us have more things expected of us than we can possibly do. As breadwinners, as parents, as Church workers and members, we face many choices on what we will do with our time and other resources. We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives."

And, "The amount of children-and-parent time absorbed in the good activities of private lessons, team sports, and other school and club activities also needs to be carefully regulated. Otherwise, children will be over scheduled, and parents will be frazzled and frustrated. Parents should act to preserve time for family prayer, family scripture study, family home evening, and other precious togetherness and individual one-on-one time that binds a family together and fixes children's values on things of eternal worth. Parents should teach gospel priorities through what they do with their children."

I talked about this last article in a post I wrote called "on the wise use of time" a couple of years ago here, but it's worth another mention. In "A Time to Prepare", Elder Ardern says, "To have the peace the Savior speaks of (see John 14:27), we must devote our time to the things that matter most, and the things of God matter most. As we engage with God in sincere prayer, read and study each day from the scriptures, ponder on what we have read and felt, and then apply and live the lessons learned, we draw nearer to Him. . . We will need to be wise in our judgement to ensure that the scales of time are correctly balanced to include the Lord, family, work, and wholesome recreational activities. As many have already discovered, there is an increase of happiness in life as we use our time to seek after those things that are 'virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy' (Articles of Faith 1:13)."

This is a lot to think about. But this is what I want to remember: I need to do less of the unimportant things, and save my energy for the best things. I have seen that as I put the best things first (things like reading my scriptures, attending the temple, having family home evening and family prayer), I seem to have time for all of the other things I need to do (like housecleaning and laundry and sewing). If I put the best things first, I feel less overwhelmed by my role as wife, mother, and homemaker.